Good Morning, !
Today is Tuesday,  October 15
____________________________________________________
Today, October 15 in 
1815 Napoleon Bonaparte began his exile on the remote island 
of St. Helena in the Atlantic Ocean.
More of today in history at History
______________________________________________________



If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, 
please donate what you can!




Today's Bonehead Award:
Creep walked 351 miles for sex with 
14-year-old, who was undercover cop
                     
_______________________________________________
If you like the Humor Letter, please vote!

_______________________________________________
You are not superior just because you see the world 
in an odious light.
--- Vicomte de Chateaubriand (1768 - 1848)

He who praises you for what you lack wishes to take 
from you what you have.
--- Don Juan Manuel (1282 - 1349)

"Everywhere, we learn only from those whom we love."
--- Goethe
_______________________________________________
 
My friend's wife returned from a tour of duty in the Middle 
East. To celebrate, he decided to take her out for a night 
on the town. Proud of her service record, he suggested she 
wear her uniform. 

Not only did a patriotic taxi driver refuse to accept money 
from them, but an appreciative citizen paid for her meal at 
the restaurant, and the theater manager upgraded their balcony 
seats to the orchestra. 

At the end of the evening, my friend turned to his wife. 
"I still get credit for taking you out, right?" 

________________________________________________`




____________________________________________________


If you like the Humor Letter, please vote!

Thanks for your votes!
___________________________________________________





An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD
has been earned by 

Tommy Lee Jenkins,
32,

Indiana

Creep walked 351 miles for sex with 
14-year-old, who was undercover cop

A convicted pedophile from Indiana was busted for trying to have
sex with a 14-year-old girl   after walking 351 miles to meet
her, according to authorities.

Tommy Lee Jenkins, 32, began an X-rated instant-message exchange
with a teen named  Kylee  in Wisconsin who was actually a
sheriff's deputy, according to the US Attorney's Office.

Jenkins asked her for sexually explicit photographs while
badgering her to meet him for sex in Whitestown, Ind., where he
lived, officials said.

When she refused, he set off on foot for where she supposedly
was, in Neenah, Wisc.   repeatedly sending her explicit messages
and updating her on the progress of his desperate hike,
according to prosecutors.

His mammoth trek ended with a surprise   with sheriff's deputies
and an FBI agent waiting to bust him, authorities announced
Friday.

Jenkins was charged with using a computer to attempt to
persuade, induce or entice a minor to engage in unlawful sexual
activity. He faces 10 years to life in prison if convicted.

His messages to 'Kylee  included telling her he wanted them to
have 500 kids together, including one within a year, according
to the Oshkosh Northwestern.

 Our nation faces an epidemic of child sexual abuse, with the
Internet making it too easy for predators to communicate with
children across the country,  said US Attorney Matthew Krueger.

 The Justice Department is committed to working with federal,
state, and local law enforcement agencies to prosecute child
sexual abuse aggressively. 

Jenkins previously pleaded guilty to child abuse in 2011 for
molesting two boys, ages 7 and 8, in Wisconsin, where he used to
live, according to the Oshkosh Northwestern.

He was sentenced to four years probation with a 360-day jail
sentence stayed, the paper said, citing court records.



DearWebby's Tech Support Pits

From: Vicky
Re: What is Twitter?

Dear Webby, 
I read so many mentions about Twitter these days and I am
wondering what it is and if it is safe.
Vicky

Dear Vicky
Twitter is like the very early IRC chats in the early 80's, 
but with mug shots and a 280 character per message limit.

If you choose to "follow" somebody, then every time they 
send a message, you see it in your Twitter page.

Some people make it a game similar to FaceBook and try
to get as many people as possible to "follow" them. That
doesn't mean that all or any of their followers actually read
their posts. If they just focus on collecting followers, chances
are that their followers are just as bland and shallow.

Every now and then you have to weed out the people whom
YOU follow. That's easy enough to do. A single click and
they are gone. The same happens to you. If you don't contribute
anything worth reading, people will stop following you.

As far as safety is concerned, I don't see any problem with
Twitter. It is limited to 280 characters of plain text, and
you just follow people interested in the same stuff you are 
interested in.

Twitter is a good way to meet people in a very casual way.
If somebody turns out to be worth it, you can send them your
email address or Skype handle in a private message.

You can sign up free at http://twitter.com. It is easy,
but most of the short names are already in use. You might have
to try for a while until you come up with a user name that
is not already in use.

It is a good idea to limit your time on Twitter, and show up
at the same hour when you do go onto Twitter. That way you
accumulate friend with the same convenience time zone, 
instead o having them spread over the whole day.

Have FUN!
DearWebby




Automatically move ALL your settings and programs. 


In the office where I work, there is a constant battle 
between our technical-support director and customer-service 
personnel over the room temperature, which is usually too 
low. 

The frustrated director, trying to get us to understand his 
position, announced one afternoon, "We need to keep the 
temperature below seventy-five degrees or the computers 
will overheat." 

Thinking that this was just another excuse, one of my 
shivering colleagues retorted, "Yeah right. So how did they 
keep the computers from overheating before there was air 
conditioning?" 



If you can help with
the cost of the
Humor Letter, please donate what you can!




"Do you love me with all your heart and soul?"
asked Vickie on Valentines Day.

"Mmm hmm." replied Wendell.

"Do you think
I'm the most beautiful girl in the world?"

"Mmm hmm."

"Do you think my lips are like rose petals?"

"Mmm hmm."

"Oh Wendell," gushed Vickie,
"you say the most beautiful things!" 

___________________________________________________

Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com
Thriftyfun.com
font color="#009990">
Chopping Nuts
For easier chopping, bake nuts in the oven for 5 to 10 minutes
at 300 degrees F (149 C) before chopping them.  A quick way to
chop nuts is to put them in a plastic bag and hit them with a
mallet or meat tenderizer, with no clean up afterwards.
thriftyfun.Com

____________________________________________________





 
Pro Wrestling Hour With Grandma

___________________________________________________

After a day full of accidents and mistakes, my coworker had 
had it. "Why," she cried out in exasperation, "do things 
that happen to stupid people keep happening to me?!"

___________________________________________________

Maybe this is why they don't teach music in high school 
any more. Following are actual answers from students on 
music tests.

- The principal singer of nineteenth century opera was 
called pre-Madonna. 

- Gregorian chant has no music, just singers singing the 
same lines. 

- Sherbet composed the Unfinished Symphony. 

- All female parts were sung by castrati. We don't know ex-
actly what they sounded like because there are no known 
descendants. 

- Young scholars have expressed their rapture for the Bronze 
Lullaby, the Taco Bell Cannon, Beethoven's Erotica, 
Tchaikovsky Cracknutter Suite, and Gershwin's Rap City in 
Blue. 

- Music sung by two people at the same time is called a 
duel; if they sing without music it is called Acapulco. 

- A virtuoso is a musician with real high morals. 

- Contralto is a low sort of music that only ladies sing. 

- Probably the most marvelous fugue was the one between the 
Hatfields and the McCoys. 

- I know what a sextet is but I'd rather not say. 

- Johann Sebastian Bach wrote a great many musical com-
positions and had a large number of children. In between he 
practiced on an old spinster which he kept up in his attic. 

- Rock Monanoff was a famous post-romantic composer of piano 
concerti. 

___________________________________________________

"People are going on dates now to coffee bars. This is the 
worst idea. Four cappuccinos later, your date doesn't look 
any better." 
--- Margot Black

__________________________________________________


Ophelia Dingbatter's
NewsNo sermon and not suitable for church, just
jokes and fun for grownups. 
Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the
double opt-in confirmation request.

___________________________________________________



Today, October 15 in
1815 Napoleon Bonaparte began his exile on the remote island of
St. Helena in the Atlantic Ocean.

1860 Grace Bedell, 11 years old, wrote a letter to presidential
candidate Abraham Lincoln. The letter stated that Lincoln would
look better if he would grow a beard.

1883 The U.S. Supreme Court struck down part of the Civil Rights
Act of 1875. It allowed for individuals and corporations to
discriminate based on race.

1892 The U.S. government announced that the land in western
Montana was open to settlers. The 1.8 million acres were bought
from the Crow Indians for 50 cents per acre.

1937 "To Have and Have Not" by Ernest Hemingway was published
for the first time.

1939 New York Municipal Airport was dedicated. The name was
later changed to La Guardia Airport.

1945 Pierre Laval, the former premier of Vichy France, was
executed for treason.

1946 Hermann Goering, a Nazi war criminal and founder of the
Gestapo, poisoned himself just hours before his scheduled
execution.

1964 It was announced that Soviet leader Nikita Khrushchev had
been removed from power. He was replaced with Alexei N. Kosygin.

1983 U.S. Marines killed five snipers who had pinned them down
in Beirut International Airport.

1984 The Freedom of Information Act was passed.

1989 Wayne Gretzky, while playing for the Los Angeles Kings,
surpassed Gordie Howe's NHL scoring record of 1,850 career
points.

1993 U.S. President Clinton sent warships to enforce trade
sanctions that had been imposed on Haitian military rulers.

1993 South Africa's President F.W. de Klerk and African National
Congress President Nelson Mandela were named winners of the
Nobel Peace Prize for their efforts to end the apartheid system
in South Africa.

1997 British Royal Air Force pilot Andy Green broke the land-
speed record by driving a jet-powered car faster than the speed
of sound.

1997 The Cassini-Huygens mission was launched from Cape
Canaveral, FL. On January 14, 2005, a probe sent back pictures
of Saturn's moon Titan during and after landing.

1998 The U.N. condemned the U.S. economic embargo on Cuba for
the seventh year in a row.

2001 NASA's Galileo spacecraft passed within 112 miles of
Jupiter's moon Io.

2011 Legoland Florida opened in Winter Haven, Florida.

2019  smiled.